SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

The anything-goes forum for insults, board drama, and interpersonal conflicts. No moderation. Rated R to NC-17.
Post Reply
User avatar
Shulem
Son of Perdition
Posts: 11271
Joined: Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:48 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Shulem »

Image

Hallelujah!

The walking dead receive the temple nail through the veil and eat the flesh of Jesus and drink his blood. Stick the nail in you and drink the blood of Jesus! Suck the blood from his bleeding wrists and feet! We desire all to receive it. Slurp it up.

Rejoice in drinking Jesus' blood with the sure sign of the nail!

Just imagine this message written in blood, curdling, red, writing.

Image

Image
Image

The Second Token of the Melchizedek Priesthood -- The Bloody Grip with a Nail in your Wrist!
Last edited by Shulem on Fri Aug 10, 2018 8:43 pm, edited 11 times in total.

User avatar
Mormonicious
God
Posts: 1497
Joined: Sun Jul 13, 2014 9:59 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Mormonicious »

Image
Revelation 2:17 . . give him a white stone, and in the stone a new name written, which no man knoweth saving he that receiveth it. Thank Google GOD for her son eBay, you can now have life eternal with laser engraving. . oh, and a seer stone too.

User avatar
Shulem
Son of Perdition
Posts: 11271
Joined: Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:48 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Shulem »

THE SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Receive your token to the glory of Mormon Temple Jesus.

Bow your head and say, "Yes".

Image

Image
Image
Last edited by Shulem on Sun Mar 31, 2019 1:53 pm, edited 6 times in total.

User avatar
Dr. Shades
Founder & Visionary
Posts: 14130
Joined: Mon Oct 23, 2006 3:07 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Dr. Shades »

[MODERATOR NOTE: Shulem, you were doing so well for such a long time. But blatantly pornographic descriptions aren't allowed in the Telestial Forum, either.

Once more, please do not log into this site when you've been drinking.]
"Finally, for your rather strange idea that miracles are somehow linked to the amount of gay sexual gratification that is taking place would require that primitive Christianity was launched by gay sex, would it not?"

--Louis Midgley

User avatar
Shulem
Son of Perdition
Posts: 11271
Joined: Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:48 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Shulem »

Dr. Shades wrote:[MODERATOR NOTE: Shulem, you were doing so well for such a long time. But blatantly pornographic descriptions aren't allowed in the Telestial Forum, either.

Once more, please do not log into this site when you've been drinking.]


I honestly don't recall drinking while last posting here in telestial. I thought I put that behind me.

Anyway, what I view as R-rated material seems a bit much for you. In my view, I haven't posted anything x-rated or pornographic in a long time so I'm at a loss.

It seems you have a problem with the way I describe Elohim coming down to copulate with Mary to make baby Jesus. Perhaps, in the future, when bringing this matter up it would be appropriate to simply quote Brigham Young. Then I won't be censored for posting pornographic stuff. Does that sound fair?

User avatar
cwald
God
Posts: 4416
Joined: Sat Jun 09, 2012 10:53 am

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by cwald »

Dr. Shades wrote:Once more, please do not log into this site when you've been drinking.

Well hell, what is the fun in that?
"Jesus gave us the gospel, but Satan invented church. It takes serious evil to formalize faith into something tedious and then pile guilt on anyone who doesn’t participate enthusiastically." - Robert Kirby

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer. -- Henry Lawson

User avatar
RockSlider
God
Posts: 6712
Joined: Tue Dec 09, 2008 10:02 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by RockSlider »

This thread is a classic.

User avatar
Shulem
Son of Perdition
Posts: 11271
Joined: Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:48 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Shulem »

RockSlider wrote:This thread is a classic.


Yep, it's a classic. It certainly makes us think just how gross and bloody it is to think about nails piercing our hands and wrists while chanting bloody rites at the temple altar. The first token of the Melchizedek priesthood is all about piercing a nail into the palm of the hand, compliments of the temple worker all dressed in white -- everyone must get their hands stabbed by the priesthood nail.

Grab your partner by the patriarchal grip or sure sign of the ____ nail and bleed them through the wrists. Holy mother ____, batman and batgirl!

O God, hear the words of my bloody mouth!

Slit your throat!

Image
Image
Image

O God, I slit my throat just for you!
Last edited by Shulem on Mon Feb 11, 2019 9:00 pm, edited 8 times in total.

User avatar
Jesse Pinkman
God
Posts: 2693
Joined: Sat Oct 05, 2013 7:58 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Jesse Pinkman »

cwald wrote:
Dr. Shades wrote:Once more, please do not log into this site when you've been drinking.

Well hell, what is the fun in that?

I hear ya! I'm drinking Pinot Noir tonight. What is everyone else drinking?
So you're chasing around a fly and in your world, I'm the idiot?

"Friends don't let friends be Mormon." Sock Puppet, MormonDiscussions.com.

Music is my drug of choice.

"And that is precisely why none of us apologize for holding it to the celestial standard it pretends that it possesses." Kerry, MormonDiscussions.com
_________________

User avatar
Shulem
Son of Perdition
Posts: 11271
Joined: Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:48 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Shulem »

The Three Sons PIGS of Perdition

Oink, oink, oink

Image

Russell Oink
Name of the second token of the Aaronic Priesthood is: RUSSELL

Dallin Oink
Name of the second token of the Aaronic Priesthood is: DALLIN

Henry Oink
Name of the second token of the Aaronic Priesthood is: HENRY

:lol: :lol: :lol:

Image
Last edited by Shulem on Thu Sep 12, 2019 7:31 pm, edited 12 times in total.

User avatar
cwald
God
Posts: 4416
Joined: Sat Jun 09, 2012 10:53 am

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by cwald »

Shulem, when was the last time you went through the temple?
"Jesus gave us the gospel, but Satan invented church. It takes serious evil to formalize faith into something tedious and then pile guilt on anyone who doesn’t participate enthusiastically." - Robert Kirby

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer. -- Henry Lawson

User avatar
Shulem
Son of Perdition
Posts: 11271
Joined: Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:48 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Shulem »

cwald wrote:Shulem, when was the last time you went through the temple?


Jesus Christ. I think it's been almost 9 or 10 years.

I left my bloody nail at the altar of the temple.

Image

Stab the nail in me for Jehovah's sake!
Last edited by Shulem on Sun Dec 30, 2018 8:30 pm, edited 3 times in total.

User avatar
cwald
God
Posts: 4416
Joined: Sat Jun 09, 2012 10:53 am

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by cwald »

Shulem wrote:
cwald wrote:Shulem, when was the last time you went through the temple?


Jesus Christ. I think it's been almost 9 or 10 years.

I left my bloody nail at the altar of the temple when I told the Holy Ghost to ____ off.


I hear you. I last went through the temple around 2002. I actually have a TR signed from 2007 which I got just at the request of the SP to hold my EQP calling. Never used it. I'm embarrassed to admit I got married in the Logan Temple, while my Dad sat outside...couldn't get in because he was smoking cigarettes at the time. God I'm ashamed of that tidbit of my history.

I was fortunate, I guess, to have gone through the temple in 1989 before the church changed the ceremony and tried to bury some of these messy details down the memory hole. I have no doubt that members are already, and will increasingly deny these kind of tokens and penalties were ever part of the most sacred of sacred Mormon temple ceremonies.

But...it's not a cult.
"Jesus gave us the gospel, but Satan invented church. It takes serious evil to formalize faith into something tedious and then pile guilt on anyone who doesn’t participate enthusiastically." - Robert Kirby

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer. -- Henry Lawson

User avatar
Shulem
Son of Perdition
Posts: 11271
Joined: Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:48 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Shulem »

cwald wrote:I was fortunate, I guess, to have gone through the temple in 1989 before the church changed the ceremony and tried to bury some of these messy details down the memory hole. I have no doubt that members are already, and will increasingly deny these kind of tokens and penalties were ever part of the most sacred of sacred Mormon temple ceremonies.


Right, future temple patrons will never believe that temple penalties were actual rituals practiced at the altar whereby the newly initiated endowed person covenants to slit their own throats and slash their bowels open rather than reveal the secret names and tokens.

I remember slitting my throat thinking it gave God pleasure because he delights in the shedding of blood. Just more blood to sprinkle on his ____ temple altar.

Right, it's not a cult.

Image

User avatar
cwald
God
Posts: 4416
Joined: Sat Jun 09, 2012 10:53 am

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by cwald »

Image
"Jesus gave us the gospel, but Satan invented church. It takes serious evil to formalize faith into something tedious and then pile guilt on anyone who doesn’t participate enthusiastically." - Robert Kirby

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer. -- Henry Lawson

User avatar
cwald
God
Posts: 4416
Joined: Sat Jun 09, 2012 10:53 am

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by cwald »

Image
"Jesus gave us the gospel, but Satan invented church. It takes serious evil to formalize faith into something tedious and then pile guilt on anyone who doesn’t participate enthusiastically." - Robert Kirby

Beer makes you feel the way you ought to feel without beer. -- Henry Lawson

User avatar
Shulem
Son of Perdition
Posts: 11271
Joined: Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:48 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Shulem »

cwald wrote:Image


Image

It's the holy nail in the wrist, baby. Press the forefinger on the wrist and feel the power. Sisters, use your clitoris finger . . . .

The temple worker will now reach out his hand and give his finger.

Sisters, it feels good.

:lol:

User avatar
Shulem
Son of Perdition
Posts: 11271
Joined: Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:48 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Shulem »

Image

The First Token of the Melchizedek Priesthood or Sign of the Nail

We will now give unto you the First Token of the Melchizedek Priesthood, or the Sign of the Nail, with its accompanying name and sign. This token is received by bringing the right hand into this position: the hand vertical, the fingers close together, and the thumb extended; and the person giving the token placing the tip of the forefinger of his right hand in the center of the palm, and the thumb opposite on the back of the hand of the one receiving it, in this manner.

The name of this token is: Son of a ____
Last edited by Shulem on Mon Feb 11, 2019 9:05 pm, edited 1 time in total.

User avatar
RockSlider
God
Posts: 6712
Joined: Tue Dec 09, 2008 10:02 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by RockSlider »

How come the ring and middle finger don't twitch? I also have some questions on the clitous finger.

User avatar
Shulem
Son of Perdition
Posts: 11271
Joined: Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:48 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Shulem »

RockSlider wrote:How come the ring and middle finger don't twitch?


Probably because the bones, sinews, and nerves have been pierced and severed to the point that crazy Jesus was unable to give the finger (as in ____ you) to the Romans who crucified him. In the meantime, Elohim was on his throne laughing his ass off.

Hey, ____ you, Jesus. Take your temple token and shove it, you ____ cocksucker.

Image

User avatar
Shulem
Son of Perdition
Posts: 11271
Joined: Thu Jun 30, 2011 7:48 pm

Re: SECOND TOKEN OF THE MELCHIZEDEK PRIESTHOOD

Post by Shulem »

Mormon Temple Penalty

ImageImage
Last edited by Shulem on Tue Aug 06, 2019 8:48 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Post Reply