No....I'm right handed (and yes I can type with only my right hand, when the left hand is usually involved with eating a sandwich)

Mmmm... Masturbation and eating simultaneously. There has to be a psychological name for such a strange habit. If there ever was a candidate for someone who needs a keyboard condom, it would definitely be someone who eats and spanks it at the same time; a mess is inevitable.

Darn! I keep meaning to post that I just ran across this infamous pamplet quoted in its entirety in the most recent Irvine Welsh novel!

*Giggle snort*

Does this thread ever get old?

I still laugh at some of this stuff sometimes.

Edit: 150th post.

:D

What is the song "Hold on Loosely" by 38 Special talking about?

;)

L
M
A
O!!

OMG, I am never going to stop laughing about ceiling kitty.

(holds sides)

My teenage sister had multiple paintings of Jesus in her room. One was on the ceiling above her bed. My husband would wake up and say "Jesus Christ!" (edited to add, while we were visiting and given her room to sleep in!)

Nobody had sex in that room. Ever.

I kind of knew what was going to be said being a deacon, teacher and priest in the 70's so I just passed it up. I finally took time to read it. I needed this - I have not laughed so hard in long time. If there is anything that can embarrass the church it is this document.

When I was in the MTC, Mark E. Peterson came to speak at the BYU sunday night thingy. After it was over he came over to the side to shake peoples hands. People were falling over each other to try and shake his hand. I sort of got disgusted and thought that all ninety year old men should experience what he is experiencing as people fall over each other to shake hands and especially the homeless - boy they should experience that too.

I quite agree.....this thread single handedly could cure all depression in the world. Funny stuff.

The early polygamy prevents masturbation.

Well screw it. I love this thread. 21,000+ views. Chew on that MADBoard!

this guy needs some serious help - LMAO

was on drudge:


http://startelegram.typepad.com/sky_tal ... s-law.html

That is massively gross! She should have sued for more. I hope she gets at least the settlement she asked for.

Time to get this thread going again.

What other funny names are there instead of "Masturbation"

I don't know why but the term "Choke the Chicken" makes me giggle.

As used in a sentence, "Grandma caught me Chokin the Chicken last night"

Kevin Spacey used these in American Beauty:

"Choking the Bishop"

"Chafing the Carrot"

"Saying Hello to my Monster"

4 years ago.

The greatest thread.

In history.

Was posted.

This is that story.

In that time.

Approximately 123 billion people have masturbated.

And to those people.

We say unto you.

Well done sir and or madam.

For those of you about to masturbate, I salute you. Well, part of me does anyway.

One girl I dated told me that at standards night in her home ward, the adult women had told them that when married, if their husbands masturbated it meant that the wife was not living up to her temple marriage commitment and that the wife needed to pick up the pace of their sexual relationship. My date asked me what I thought? I asked her why she would think of disobeying her church leaders? She got mad, because it was as I was in the process of bugging out of the LDS Church and she'd heard me challenge this advice or that from leaders on numerous occasions.

Tyrion Lannister made the bald man cry:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZz3bxPSVnY