I already outed myself
with this sock puppet, so I don't know how fun it would be now that everyone knows who it is.
And like I said when I outed myself, every single thing Sister Hunt has said on the board is based on real encounters and experiences I have had with TBM's. That means I have to channel a TBM to do a Mica Hunt post, and I'm not sure how much I have the stomach for that right now.
There was an exhibit at the South Towne [sic] Exposition Center in Sandy, Utah this week where you could go look at the floats for the 24th of July Parade. I went to that (obligated by family).
For those not familiar with this ritual, the 24th of July is a state holiday in Utah because this is the day when Brigham Young, lying sick in his wagon, was pulled into Emigration Canyon in the Salt Lake Valley and said, "f*** this s***, I'm not going any further." This was later paraphrased to, "This is the right place."
Part of this annual ritual is a rodeo in downtown Salt Lake City: your chance to see brave men and women try to outwit livestock. But there is also the parade through downtown Salt Lake. Every year this has the same theme, but phrased a different way: "Pioneering to the Future," "From Past to Present," "Today is the Yesterday We Will Regret Tomorrow." This year is, "Then and Now." LDS wards and stakes from around Utah have floats in the parade, each of which celebrates temples, missionaries, the current president of the Church, seagulls, or reminds us how Mormons in 1847 had the same worldview and same concept of Mormonism as LDS people in the suburban Wasatch Front do today.
Utah's answer to Charles Wysocki, Eric Dowdle (they're Americana-type folk artists), has immortalized the Days of '47 Parade in his art:
Every year, residents of Utah can look forward to a big thumbs up from the prophet in the Pioneer Day parade:
And of course parades are one of the two times when playing the bagpipes are acceptable (the other time being at funerals for police officers).
At any other time, there is no jury in America that would convict you of murder for killing someone because they were playing the bagpipes.
Here's a float from this year's parade, celebrating how people used to have to watch primitive TV sets to hear Thomas S. Monson drone on and on about Thanksgiving programs for widows and people with Alzheimer's recognizing him but not their own family members. Today, these important prophetic messages can be heard on an iPod.
Or if you want a special glimpse into the TBM psyche, here's a float from a different year about "liberty," where Captain Moroni from the Book of Mormon waves the title of liberty, while a modern U.S. soldier pulls a pioneer handcart. This is what Dadaism would have looked like if Mormons had invented it.
You can read a Church News article about this annual ritual here: http://www.ldschurchnews.com/articles/5 ... itage.html
There is also an official "Days of '47" site: http://www.daysof47.com/
Please note, however, that the Mormon War, polygamy, the continued practice of polygamy after the Church promised it would stop, the Mountain Meadows Massacre, the Adam-God theory, and black people being the cursed seed of Cain are not typically included in any Pioneer Day parade floats, as such things are not officially considered to be part of our Pioneer Heritage.