It is currently Sun Nov 23, 2014 2:42 am

All times are UTC - 8 hours [ DST ]




Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 931 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ... 45  Next
Author Message
 Post subject: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Sun Jun 13, 2010 2:50 am 
Let's be honest. We love the MADhouse. And why shouldn't we? It is a wonderful bin full of some of the nicest and looniest people you could ever hope to meet. From time to time, for those who bother reading the board, we find interesting tidbits. Some lend insight into the mopologetic mind, others are downright clever and funny (Nehor may be the best), and others are chilling.

I propose, therefore, a clearing house of sorts. If, in your journies, you find a particularly sparkly gem, place it on display here. You can comment on it or just let the word speak for themselves. I would love to have a collection available for future generations.

Enjoy!

ERayR:
Quote:
Just a thought. He who chooses to live life by adherng to principles has an easy life because he who lives by principle has 99% of his choices already made.

http://www.mormonapologetics.org/topic/ ... 1208863253


Top
  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Sun Jun 13, 2010 3:46 am 
God
User avatar

Joined: Sun Dec 07, 2008 5:12 am
Posts: 1630
Location: California
Who's this "Obiwan" bumpkin?

Quote:
To be fair though.... Really [Obama]'s more Marxist/Communist/Socialist/Liberal/Progressive than anything else.
His hatred of America and wanting to make it low comes more from that than anything else. He's mostly only Muslim because of how he was raised and his belief structures, not that he's entirely Muslim alone. So, I wouldn't be surprised if he said it in private to show that's who he is "inside", in contrast to what he shows on the outside.


Yeah, buddy, it's real even-handed to say that Obama probably isn't that Muslim because he's too much of a Marxist. Thanks for your level-headed contribution.

_________________
"You clearly haven't read [Dawkins'] book." -Kevin Graham, 11/04/09


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Sun Jun 13, 2010 6:54 am 
θεά
User avatar

Joined: Sat Jul 26, 2008 10:06 pm
Posts: 3457
Location: Palatine, IL
"The last time I saw stats (and it's been a while) children in interfaith marriages didn't choose religion at all let alone pick one. If your parents don't think it is important enough to back one religion then obviously neither one really matters." ~ Juliann, 6/6/2010

So, the only way I can communicate to my daughter that my religion matters is to stop bringing her to church with me and allow her to be raised exclusively in the LDS church.

Makes perfect sense.

---------

(6/22/2011 - Updated post to provide link to new URL)

_________________
My Blogs: ClobberBlog | Προστάτις | Worlds Without End: A Mormon Studies Roundtable


Last edited by MsJack on Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:03 pm, edited 2 times in total.

Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Sun Jun 13, 2010 7:42 am 
Has More Degrees Than Droopy
User avatar

Joined: Thu Aug 14, 2008 3:21 pm
Posts: 2534
Location: Cassius University: Ho Chi Minh Professor of American Military History
"Whatever appears to be against the Book of Mormon is going to be overturned at some time in the future. So we can be pretty open minded."-charity 3/7/07

_________________
Whatever appears to be against the Book of Mormon is going to be overturned at some time in the future. So we can be pretty open minded.-charity 3/7/07

MASH quotes
I peeked in the back [of the Bible] Frank, the Devil did it.
I avoid church religiously.
This isn't one of my sermons, I expect you to listen.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Sun Jun 13, 2010 10:24 am 
bcspace:

“I believe resurrected people… will be fully functional with regards to sex.”

“I just can’t see us standing around [in Heaven] doing nothing all day but playing the harp and eating at the buffet while never getting fat.”

“How is Christ historical if the Book of Mormon is allegorical or fraudulant?”

“God does justify killing others.”

“Ours is the only Christian doctrine that makes any Biblical sense.”

“True Christianity (LDS) will have it’s ups and downs but will survive as it has never been one of control or beholden to dogma that conflicts with science.”

“Liberals, socialists, marxist, feminists, homosexuals, pedophiles, Fatah, Hamas, Hizbollah, Al Qaida, antiMormons, Carter, Clinton, Johnson etc…”

“Ding dong the witch [Senator Ted Kennedy] is dead!”

“Of course now I’m free to teach that homosexuals are not normal healthy people without any opposition.”

There are just too many.


Top
  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 12:38 am 
θεά
User avatar

Joined: Sat Jul 26, 2008 10:06 pm
Posts: 3457
Location: Palatine, IL
"Seems to me it's evidence of the weakness of their position when they have to tilt the playing field so far in their favor." ~ jwhitlock, 6/13/2010

----------

(6/22/2011 - It seems this thread was deleted when MADB switched to MDDB, so the link to the original no longer works.)

_________________
My Blogs: ClobberBlog | Προστάτις | Worlds Without End: A Mormon Studies Roundtable


Last edited by MsJack on Wed Jun 22, 2011 5:13 pm, edited 1 time in total.

Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 12:42 am 
MsJack wrote:
"Seems to me it's evidence of the weakness of their position when they have to tilt the playing field so far in their favor." ~ jwhitlock, 6/13/2010

Wow, that is a very good one! I wonder if he at least blinked when he typed that.

Keep 'em coming!


Top
  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 4:56 am 
Image
William Schryver
Vulgar Sciolist

Quote:
"I am certainly not bothered at all by the very distinct possibility that Joseph incorrectly assumed that the name he had received by revelation (Shulem) was contained in the characters above the figure. After all, it is the text of the Book of Abraham that was always his primary focus. In my judgment, his work on the facsimiles was secondary in nature, and although he demonstrates definite strokes of inspiration in the process of working with them, I don't consider them of the same stature as the text of the Book of Abraham; I don't believe they were ever intended to be regarded as highly, and they probably should never have been included in the canon along with the text of Book of Abraham. At some point in the future, I wouldn't be surprised to see the "facsimiles" removed from the formal canon of the church."


Top
  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 8:09 am 
God
User avatar

Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2007 7:59 am
Posts: 7899
Gadianton Plumber wrote:
Let's be honest. We love the MADhouse.

Being honest, I would say unequivocally that I do NOT love the MADhouse. In fact, "love" would be the last way to describe my opinion of that idiot's paradise. I literally haven't been there in years (since before it was changed from FAIR); masochism is not my thing.

Gadianton Plumber wrote:
(Nehor may be the best)

At what? Utter lunacy? Yeah, probably, although from what I've read on this thread, he's got some serious competition. If you enjoy reading arrogant, idiotic delusion in action, MAD is the place for you.

_________________
"You get to have your own beliefs, and your own wishes, and dreams, and imaginations. What you don't get to have is your own reality." - Sethbag

"Salt Lake, we have a problem." - Fence Sitter


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 8:41 am 
God

Joined: Tue Dec 04, 2007 5:39 am
Posts: 6903
I think ERayR's quote can be refined a little bit into something I agree with and regard as insightful. Overarching principles for behavior are an important heuristic tool that takes out the difficulty in trying to weigh the risks and benefits of every little decision detail by detail. It also reduces the chances of individual poor decision making by relying on already established wisdom about what is apt to work and not.

I'm willing to bet if we were to examine the content of ERayR's thought, the problem is more with what principles he chooses to adopt, why, and the unthinking attitude with which he holds them.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 9:46 am 
Ahab:
Quote:
If a "Prophet" is ever wrong, then he isn't acting as a prophet/Prophet, so you are okay then.

http://www.mormonapologetics.org/topic/ ... 1208863823


Top
  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 9:47 am 
God
User avatar

Joined: Sat Nov 04, 2006 10:06 pm
Posts: 15050
Location: Sterling, Virginia
MsJack wrote:
"The last time I saw stats (and it's been a while) children in interfaith marriages didn't choose religion at all let alone pick one. If your parents don't think it is important enough to back one religion then obviously neither one really matters." ~ Juliann, 6/6/2010

So, the only way I can communicate to my daughter that my religion matters is to stop bringing her to church with me and allow her to be raised exclusively in the LDS church.

Makes perfect sense.


I'm pretty sure Juliann stole this from Dr. Laura, who frowns on interfaith marriages.

_________________
Runtu's Rincón

If you just talk, I find that your mouth comes out with stuff. -- Karl Pilkington


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 10:37 am 
Dark Lord of the Sith
User avatar

Joined: Wed May 12, 2010 5:16 pm
Posts: 12563
Location: A castellated abbey
There are so many, but I really enjoy Wade "We're Not a Cult" Englund's opening post in the thread he started, "Great Relief for the "Ark-Steadiers." This post just so perfectly captures the mindset of "our job is to do as we're told."

wenglund wrote:
There seems to be not a few good and faithful members who have been troubled by the policies and practice of the Church and its leaders (both past and present), and this to the point where these members, in their position of relative ignorance and lack of authority, have felt themselves in a position to counsel and criticize both God and the bretheren. And, when things don't seem to go as they believe they ought, and even when things do eventually come around to their way of thinking, they may become disgruntled and even loose faith.

The wonderful news is, there is relief for these good and faithful members. God, in his infinite wisdom and love, has put his perfect Son in charge of the Church, and his Son has establish his kingdom on earth, where admittedly fallible leaders are called by revelation and inspiration, and where each member is given their own respective stewartships and responsibilities and accountabilities. In short, God has established order and lines of communication and authority.

What this means is, when the Church leaders sets forth a practice, then all of the why's and wherefore's are really between them and God. They are to answer to God and not to us, for what they do in their callings. Since it isn't our responsibility, we can be greatly relieved to know that we don't need to capreciously make their business our business, or steady the ark of their stewrtship. We can unburden ourselves from the unwarranted responsibility of usurping their authority, and can be relieved to know that we can swallow our pride, trust in God, and concern ourselves with minding our own business. In fact, it is preferred, and works bests for all parties, when we do mind our own business--which entails striving to grow ourselves towards becoming like Christ, and to assist others within our stewartship to do likewise.

So, ye who have been heavily ladened by wrongfully taking upon you God's and the Church leader's business, lay it all at Christ's feet. Let him make your burden easy and your yoke light. Trouble yourself no longer with things that don't concern you. Rest your mind instead simply on what you have been called and are intended to do.


And high five to Selek in the same thread for cogently describing the tribalism, hyper-defensiveness, and persecution complex that we all know and love.

selek wrote:
Those who wish to attack the true Church of Jesus Christ will find (or invent) reasons to do so- no matter how many you take away.

Throwing our earlier leaders and beliefs to the wolves in the hopes that they'll suddenly like us is futile, intellectually dishonest, and morally indefensible.

Appeasement is the way of the coward- the Danes knew it, as should any reasonably serious student of history.

"Once you have paid the Danegeld, you're never rid of the Dane."

Someone who is willing to belittle the Church in order to win a pat on the head from the rabid apostates, or to throw the Church under the bus to win the fawning approval of Babylon will be willing to surrender much more if the stakes are higher.

We used to call such people "collaborators" and "Quislings"- now they presume to lecture us about propriety and being "open-minded" and "true Christians".

Surrendering one's principles, one's dignity, and licking the boots of tools, pawns, and sons of Perdition is NOT how one "endures to the end".

_________________
And the life of the ebony clock went out with that of the last of the gay. And the flames of the tripods expired. And Darkness and Decay and the Red Death held illimitable dominion over all.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 10:54 am 
God
User avatar

Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2007 7:59 am
Posts: 7899
wenglund wrote:
Trouble yourself no longer with things that don't concern you.

How can something not concern you and trouble you at the same time?

That's kind of like saying, "Stop reading illegible stuff."

_________________
"You get to have your own beliefs, and your own wishes, and dreams, and imaginations. What you don't get to have is your own reality." - Sethbag

"Salt Lake, we have a problem." - Fence Sitter


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 11:36 am 
God
User avatar

Joined: Sat Oct 27, 2007 3:15 pm
Posts: 3152
In a discussion on the priesthood ban, someone asked what the "pros" were for the Church in having the ban.

Here's what Avatar4321 came up with:

Quote:
When you take out the emotional sentiment of the issues, there are a number of pro issues.

1) It prevented the Church from segregating in a time in America where Racism and segregation was rampant.

2) It kept the Church from doing intensive missionary work in many areas of Africa where Missionaries were seen as political pawns of colonialism and oppression. Allowing the Church to enter a generation after all the colonial upheavel when sentiments were more condusive for the growth of the Church there.

3) It tested the faith of all the members of the Church.

_________________
Cinepro's Got a Blog


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 2:29 pm 
God
User avatar

Joined: Thu Feb 22, 2007 3:52 am
Posts: 6236
Shouldn't Avatar have said it prevented the church from desegregating? I don't get her point if she really meant segregating, because the church was "prevented" from segregating only by scaring off all the blacks so that segregation vs. desegregation wasn't even really a question.

I can't think of specific quotes offhand, but if I could nominate anyone I'd say just about anything ever written on MAD by Hammer.

I would love to see Hammer and Nightlion go at it in a battle of wits and revelation. We could set it up with bleachers on one side for the audience, and they would stand on a sort of long narrow strip like what fencers stand on during competition, and they would prophecy and utter revelation, and condemnation, and righteous judgment at each other until one of them buckles and we find out which of them really has God on their side, if any.

_________________
The Church has confirmed that, whilst legally married to Emma, Joseph Smith had sex with women to whom he was not legally married. Is there another definition of adultery that I'm unaware of? - Bazooka


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 2:38 pm 
θεά
User avatar

Joined: Sat Jul 26, 2008 10:06 pm
Posts: 3457
Location: Palatine, IL
Avatar4321 is a man.

_________________
My Blogs: ClobberBlog | Προστάτις | Worlds Without End: A Mormon Studies Roundtable


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 3:46 pm 
God
User avatar

Joined: Mon Dec 04, 2006 11:48 am
Posts: 18397
Quote:
bcspace:

“I believe resurrected people… will be fully functional with regards to sex.”

“I just can’t see us standing around [in Heaven] doing nothing all day but playing the harp and eating at the buffet while never getting fat.”

“How is Christ historical if the Book of Mormon is allegorical or fraudulant?”

“God does justify killing others.”

“Ours is the only Christian doctrine that makes any Biblical sense.”

“True Christianity (LDS) will have it’s ups and downs but will survive as it has never been one of control or beholden to dogma that conflicts with science.”

“Liberals, socialists, marxist, feminists, homosexuals, pedophiles, Fatah, Hamas, Hizbollah, Al Qaida, antiMormons, Carter, Clinton, Johnson etc…”

“Ding dong the witch [Senator Ted Kennedy] is dead!”

“Of course now I’m free to teach that homosexuals are not normal healthy people without any opposition.”

There are just too many.


Sa-weet! Good quotes those, especially if you know the context. Thanks!

_________________
Machina Sublime
Satan's Plan Deconstructed.
Your Best Resource On Joseph Smith's Polygamy.
Conservatism is the Gospel of Christ and the Plan of Salvation in Action.
The Degeneracy Of Progressivism.
A lesson on 'Faggotry' for Kevin Graham; a legitimately descriptive and even positive term used by homosexuals themselves.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 3:50 pm 
God
User avatar

Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2007 7:59 am
Posts: 7899
bcspace wrote:
Quote:
bcspace:

“I believe resurrected people… will be fully functional with regards to sex.”

“I just can’t see us standing around [in Heaven] doing nothing all day but playing the harp and eating at the buffet while never getting fat.”

“How is Christ historical if the Book of Mormon is allegorical or fraudulant?”

“God does justify killing others.”

“Ours is the only Christian doctrine that makes any Biblical sense.”

“True Christianity (LDS) will have it’s ups and downs but will survive as it has never been one of control or beholden to dogma that conflicts with science.”

“Liberals, socialists, marxist, feminists, homosexuals, pedophiles, Fatah, Hamas, Hizbollah, Al Qaida, antiMormons, Carter, Clinton, Johnson etc…”

“Ding dong the witch [Senator Ted Kennedy] is dead!”

“Of course now I’m free to teach that homosexuals are not normal healthy people without any opposition.”

There are just too many.


Sa-weet! Good quotes those, especially if you know the context. Thanks!

I think it's pretty funny you think context would save any one of those quotes, unless the context was that they were preceded by the phrase, "Wouldn't it be ludicrous if I actually believed..."

_________________
"You get to have your own beliefs, and your own wishes, and dreams, and imaginations. What you don't get to have is your own reality." - Sethbag

"Salt Lake, we have a problem." - Fence Sitter


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 3:55 pm 
God
User avatar

Joined: Mon Dec 04, 2006 11:48 am
Posts: 18397
Quote:
I think it's pretty funny you think context would save any one of those quotes,


I don't think they need saving. Notice that I didn't say they needed the context, only that they would be better within such context. There is nothing about those quotes by themselves to be embarrassed about.

_________________
Machina Sublime
Satan's Plan Deconstructed.
Your Best Resource On Joseph Smith's Polygamy.
Conservatism is the Gospel of Christ and the Plan of Salvation in Action.
The Degeneracy Of Progressivism.
A lesson on 'Faggotry' for Kevin Graham; a legitimately descriptive and even positive term used by homosexuals themselves.


Top
 Profile  
 
 Post subject: Re: The Definitive MADhouse Quote Page.
PostPosted: Mon Jun 14, 2010 4:00 pm 
God
User avatar

Joined: Tue Mar 27, 2007 7:59 am
Posts: 7899
bcspace wrote:
Quote:
I think it's pretty funny you think context would save any one of those quotes,


I don't think they need saving. Notice that I didn't say they needed the context, only that they would be better within such context. There is nothing about those quotes by themselves to be embarrassed about.

Well, a baby isn't embarrassed when he s***s his diapers either, so I guess I see why these quotes don't shame you.

_________________
"You get to have your own beliefs, and your own wishes, and dreams, and imaginations. What you don't get to have is your own reality." - Sethbag

"Salt Lake, we have a problem." - Fence Sitter


Top
 Profile  
 
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic Reply to topic  [ 931 posts ]  Go to page 1, 2, 3, 4, 5 ... 45  Next

All times are UTC - 8 hours [ DST ]


Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Google [Bot], Gunnar and 12 guests


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Jump to:  
Revival Theme By Brandon Designs By B.Design-Studio © 2007-2008 Brandon
Revival Theme Based off SubLite By Echo © 2007-2008 Echo
Powered by phpBB © 2000, 2002, 2005, 2007 phpBB Group